I have got a date for my PET scan, the 8^th December, a day after my birthday.  I cannot wait to find out if I will need more chemo or not!

I am still feeling tired most days.  However, I think my immune system is a little bit better than it has been.  I woke up with a really sore throat on Saturday morning, and normally this would have developed into a full blown flu, but I managed to fight it off, and my throat was fine by Sunday morning.  I suppose I am getting stronger.

We are having a party in our Dream House in about two weeks time, and I want to feel better for it, and be able to dance!  I have already been putting together a play list for the party….

Ian, my friend sent me a BBC news link today: Paul Allen, co-founder of Microsoft, and the 32^nd richest person in the World has been diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma, the same type as mine, diffuse large B-cell lymphoma.  Apparently, he is feeling OK, and he is optimistic he is going to beat it!  It just shows, anyone can get it….

I have successfully managed to avoid infections and hospitals again after the latest chemo!  I am getting good at this.  I am feeling like a weak old woman this week, but apart from that I feel well.  Just tired, and in the need of sleeping, a lot.  But, if I allow myself to rest when the body says so, I seem to be fine.  I just need to get through this week, and I should be ‘home and dry’!

I have not been to Maggie’s for a couple of weeks now, but I am going tomorrow.  I am having reflexology treatment, which so lovely!  I really look forward to going there, and get pampered.

I am still waiting to hear from the Royal Marsden regards to my PET scan appointment.  It should be on around the 8^th or the 9^th December.

I had my 6^th cycle of chemo on Monday.  At the clinic appointment prior to the chemo, I was told what the plan was…  I will have a PET scan in four weeks time, and no chemo in three weeks time like I would normally have.  Instead I will have a clinic appointment on the 14^th December when I will know if I will need more chemo or not.  So, I will have to be patient and wait, again.  I have definitely learned to be more patient during this cancer, which is something I was not very good at before.

I am having trouble sleeping because of steroids, and I was feeling really grotty yesterday.  I managed to get some sleep last night, so I am feeling better today, and hopefully I do not need to sleep all day like yesterday.

I had a lovely day yesterday!  Jukka paid me a visit and we enjoyed some quality coffees, hot chocolate, chocolate brownies, and chocolate biscuits.  I do not know if it was the chocolate high that made me feel great, but I accepted Jukka’s invitation to venture out of the house, and go and see the Amish Kapoor exhibition with him and his Finnish friend Jaakko (or Jasu) at the Royal Academy of Arts.

The exhibition was brilliant, so uplifting, and quite playful and funny.  It left me feeling all smiley and slightly mischievous!  Jukka sneakily took some pictures in there even though it was prohibited.  I highly recommend the exhibition, go and see it if you can!

Afterwards, we met up with Daniel, Jukka’s partner in a cosy pub in Mayfair.  And, later on we went for a delicious meal at this brand new restaurant near Jukka’s.  I was really pleased that the restaurant provided alco hand gel in the toilets.  It made me feel at ease re bacteria!

It was such a brilliant day and evening!  Thank you Jukka, Jasu and Daniel.

Me in front of one of Anish Kapoor's art work.

The security guy was standing right behind Jukka when he took this pic. I am looking slightly nervous...

Jukka and Jasu in a pub in Mayfair.

Suzie flushed and changed the dressings of my PICC yesterday.  We took some pictures (please see below).  It still makes me laugh to think what we are doing, using needles, syringes, catheter stabilizing devices, etc.  Neither of us could not have imagined doing anything like this 7 months ago…  Now, both of us have become PICC experts!

The PICC before the dressings change. Suzie made little 'origami' parcels to cover the end bits of the PICC last time. She's very artistic.

All the equipment is ready!

Suzie getting the heparin sodium flushing solution ready for the flushing.

All done! Look how neat it is. Suzie's good!

The final step is to cover the whole thing with a tubicrip.

I have been busy with my guests from Finland, my little sister Johanna and her partner, Sami.  They arrived last Wednesday and have just left.  I managed not to be ill in the hospital!  We had a lovely time, mostly in east London.  We even went to a Halloween house warming party at Suzie’s boss’s place.  The theme was to dress as someone you wished dead, or as someone who is already dead.  I cannot wish anyone dead, not good karma, so I dressed as Farrah Fawcett from the old Charlie’s Angels.  She died of anal cancer in June this year.  Suzie went as Louise Brooks, the old American silent movie actress.

On Friday, I called Lucy my nurse at the Royal Marsden as I wanted to know about my CT scan.  She said it was looking good, “stable”, as expected.  I said to Lucy, I knew it was difficult to say how many cycles I will need at this stage as I knew they were planning to do the PET scan after the 6^th cycle, but I wanted to know what she thought, did she think I needed more than 6 cycles.  She said, yes it is difficult to say for sure before the PET scan, but what she can see from the scans so far, she thinks it looks like I will only need 6 cycles.  She said, there might be some scar tissue left in the end, but the cancer was stable.  After the phone call I was a little stunned; it was the first time I had heard that the treatment might be over soon.  I was quite moved.  I am nearly there!!  Even though I will not know if the 6^th cycle will be my very last one, I will go to it thinking it is, and will make it a special occasion.

Johanna, Sami, Shawn, Minna, Suzie and I went for a delicious dinner at the Princess Pub near Old Street. (In this pic: Sami, Johanna, Shawn and I)

The original Louise Brooks.

Suzie as Louise Brooks!

Farrah Fawcett in Charlie's Angels.

This is me as 'Farrah'. Shame about the tubicrip. But, maybe she had one too when receiving treatment for her cancer?

Farrah and Louise.

Johanna and Sami in south Hackney.

A special mention to Suzie who flushed and changed my PICC line yesterday.  Not only did she remind me that it needed doing, but also she did it with no complaints, smiling through it.  And may I just add that no nurse does it with such care like Suzie does.

It is the 8^th day post the 5^th chemo.  Normally this week I feel mega rubbish, and like in 50% of chemos so far, I would be in a hospital for IV antibiotics right now.  I had been feeling fine up to Sunday, when I woke up extremely exhausted.  I simply could not get out of bed, and had to sleep all day, literally.  I felt like my body needed it.  Yesterday I woke up feeling much better, not great, but not as bad as I normally would on the day 7 post chemo.  I think the sleep really made a difference!  My advice is to carefully listen to the body, and do what it asks you to do.  Whenever I have gone against it, it has gone horribly wrong.  Do not push yourself unnecessarily.

My very good friend, Sofia came to give me Reiki last night.  Afterwards, I was half asleep, and needed to curl up in bed.  I slept really well, and feel like the Reiki has given me more energy, as I do not feel as grotty as I would normally feel now.  Maybe, I am finally learning how to manage these chemos!

What is Reiki?  According to the International Center 
for Reiki Training:

“Reiki is a Japanese technique for stress reduction and relaxation that also promotes healing. It is administered by “laying on hands” and is based on the idea that an unseen “life force energy” flows through us and is what causes us to be alive. If one’s “life force energy” is low, then we are more likely to get sick or feel stress, and if it is high, we are more capable of being happy and healthy.

The word Reiki is made of two Japanese words – Rei which means “God’s Wisdom or the Higher Power” and Ki which is “life force energy”. So Reiki is actually “spiritually guided life force energy.”

A treatment feels like a wonderful glowing radiance that flows through and around you. Reiki treats the whole person including body, emotions, mind and spirit creating many beneficial effects that include relaxation and feelings of peace, security and wellbeing. Many have reported miraculous results.

Reiki is a simple, natural and safe method of spiritual healing and self-improvement that everyone can use. It has been effective in helping virtually every known illness and malady and always creates a beneficial effect. It also works in conjunction with all other medical or therapeutic techniques to relieve side effects and promote recovery.”

I had such a lovely uplifting day yesterday!  I met an old Finnish friend (boyfriend) Jukka whom I had not seen for about 13 years.  It was like no time had passed between us at all.  We are so alike, and still excited about the same things; music, travelling, finding happy balance between work and life.  I totally feel, I do not want to go back to the rat race once I am well again.  It is not worth it, it just makes you ill.  Well, look at me!  I want to go back to work, but do it maybe part time initially, and maybe combine two different jobs.

Jukka, his boyfriend and their two lovely Aussie friends are spending Christmas in London too.  They do not live far, and I would LOVE if we would join forces and have Christmas together, and have a big Finnish, Aussie, Dutch, English Christmas…  I will have to speak to Jukka about this.

I am feeling excited and happy today!

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